Have you ever heard the expression, “A watched pot never boils.”? And seriously, how long does a pot of water take to boil when you stare at it the whole time? If you asked me, I’d say at least twice as long as if I walked away and let it do its thing.
This can translate into health and fitness goals very easily! You hit the gym every day this week, AND stuck to your diet all week long! But you don’t look any different on Friday than you did on Monday… what gives?!
That brings me to the actual topic of this article
(finally, right?!)… Willpower!
How excited do you get when it’s Day 1 of your “new lifestyle”? You are pumped, ready to take on anything, ready to do the thing even when it’s hard… and just READY TO GO!! But then the first week ends and maybe you lost a pound or so, and then the first month ends, and maybe you’ve made a small amount of progress and then the progress gets slower and slower while you have to work harder and harder and then…… you’re not feeling so pumped up anymore.. Actually, you’ve bailed on the gym, gave your new lifestyle the middle finger because it’s clearly not working fast enough and basically on a landslide right back to where you started and you blame it on the fact that you lost your motivation or you just don't have the willpower like the fitness pros do. And here’s where I burst the bubble for you… That’s a huge load of garbage! Motivation and willpower literally do nothing for you beyond maybe helping you take that first actionable step in your journey to achieving whatever it is you're out to achieve! Sure motivation makes taking that first step SUPER exciting and probably a little easier.. But beyond that..
Patti Johnson, a Los Angeles-based licensed psychologist, says to help her patients grasp the concept of willpower versus discipline, she shares with them the following example: “Willpower is buying your favorite candy a week before Halloween and then trying not to eat it. Discipline is not buying it until the day of Halloween and then buying a type you don’t like. Trying to succeed with willpower alone isn’t very effective. Add discipline, and you eliminate the struggle.”
That’s right friends, DISCIPLINE!! Creating routines and forming habits that support the direction you want to go.
“To say no when you need to say no, and yes when you need to say yes, you need a third power: the ability to remember what you really want,” says Kelly McGonigal, Stanford psychologist and author of “The Willpower Instinct.” “I know, you think that what you really want is the brownie, the third martini or the day off, but when you’re facing temptation or flirting with procrastination, you need to remember that what you really want is to fit into your skinny jeans, get the promotion, get out of credit card debt, stay in your marriage … Otherwise, what’s going to stop you from following your immediate desires?”
How do you do this?
Define your long term goal
Break it up into smaller, more quickly attainable short term goals
Make a plan that will lead to success in achieving these goals and try to make this enjoyable.. (What’s life without a little fun?!)
Line up a support system. (The power of accountability is huge!!)
And now settle in!
Explore how to set SMART goals here <<
Do it when you don’t want to, do it when it seems like it isn’t working fast enough, do it when others say you can’t, do it when YOU say you can’t… just keep going!
Stop watching the darn pot and do something else while it comes to a boil because staring at it and wishing it would boil faster when it’s quite literally impossible (or comparing it to Karen’s pot that’s already boiling even though you KNOW she turned the heat on way before you did) is a giant waste of your precious time!
References
McGonigal, Kelly. The Willpower Instinct: How Self-Control Works, Why It Matters, and What You Can Do to Get More of It. Avery, 2013.
*The resources and links listed are only suggested as sources for further exploration. They do not necessarily imply endorsement.
**Photos may be taken from Google.
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